Basically all the drama is that it’s starting to appear my relationship is crumbling and last night I went hyper crazy (boyzici knows the indepth stuff) and it all got a bit uncontrolable.

I haven’t gone in to the specifics of it with him on the phone but I’ve layed the following up on the line and it’s his to choose what direction and what stupid shit he wants to get up to.

The sex, we haven’t fully partook in penetrative sex since New Years eve. This is the major part of the wreck that is becoming the relationship.

On a number of occasions I’ve pushed having random sex at various times but each time I was rejected, so I got angry with him and I hold a grudge until the end of time. So I’ve been purposely not doing the deed with him for six months. So he’s been saying recetly that if I don’t give it to him he’ll go else where and for all I know he could of, but I trust he’s got the sense not to do that kind of thing. Although on his out profile it says “minogamous but needs freedom” (yeah wtf).

Anyways, I’m changing the rules of this one a bit. First of all I’ve put down this: don’t ask, just grab and go. It sounds weird but when he does it, I can’t describe how horny it is just to have your trousers torn off, legs put up high and getting it hard and fast without warning. Although if I want him to stop then that’s in this clause. Second one is: you choose. Unless it’s painful I won’t object to what his speed and angle is. In fact there isn’t much point in offering my hole for his exploits if I attach requirements to him. I want him to take as much pleasure from having sex with me as possible. And when I’m ready to finish off I’ll then take the initiation. Third is: anytime anywhere, in the kitchen, lounge, dining table, whatever where ever. Fourth being: more than twice. On a weekend I want to be shagged morning, noon and night and all times inbetween. On a weekday I want it through out the evening and night (or morning if he’s adventureous!). Where as before I didn’t do it out of spite, I want to do it as many times as he likes for his enjoyment. Hopefully he’ll go for it and go mad with me :)

It’s not that I’m trying to be his sex slave, but that it will lead to use being more intimate with each other, because he’ll have and choose his opportunities to initiate sex which most times are very loving (with the occasional hard sex) and touching, so hopefully he’ll get back in to touching me and getting close with me and will associate our relationship as very trusting, open (not as in an open relationship) and close. If not then, er, it might just break down. We’ll see.

Listening to:

Vibe: NoMoodTag

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