I quite like my job, but this week has been a test of my patience. Today is either the final test or at least the midway point to a complete breakdown.

Having been gone no less than 16 hours from a four day long non-stop working stint i’m back in for a full day of sunday halarity. So far it’s been one exciting level of human retardation after another. Don’t get me wrong but i like helping people out otherwise i’d not be working in a customer service job, but lord are these people utter pillocks.

I’ve had one man sparking off about his car not working and the battery being dead, but he then told me he’s spent the last TWO MONTHS jump starting it and he went to get a new battery friday that would have fixed the problem but the kwik fit he went to said we wouldn’t authorise it (without calling up first). He then went on to say that he couldn’t be bothered to call us or argue and left. Sorry mate, driver error.

The next highlight was one chap without any form of brakes on his car, as amusingly dangerous this happens to be he said “well i drove it back to the depot i figured 50 mile an hour on a clear motorway would be fine”. I took joy in reminding him what happens if you smack in to something at that speed.

Then there was “i know better man”, i know what i do myself and i have some knowledge to work from but by no means do i know it all. But everytime i get one of these jerks i seem to know better than them. He called in with one light dimmer than the other on the headlamps. I advised this sounds like an electrical issue with the vehicle and that the company would not have put two different bulbs in, he confirmed it was the exact same bulb, but said in the usual condescending tone “well i’d like to disagree as when he was testing a bulb he left a small piece of plastic foam on it and it lit fire” i enquired “did that bulb go in your car?” he advised “no” chalk another one up on the moron board.

And now the odd call - “i’ve injured myself and can’t drive, nothing to do with the car but can my friend drive it?”, i didn’t dare ask what he did, but what ever it was he must have done a spectacular job, i told him as long as they’ve got insurance to drive it under their policy on minimum third party only then it’s fine. They checked the policy wording and confirmed and off they went.

Now I wait, patiently for another heap to present itself on my line. The only redemption i get is knowing somebody has to say us 5p a minute to hear my voice.

Originally published at Кевин.com.ua. You can comment here or there.

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